Obi-John Commands You!

Hello Kindred Souls, if there are any of you still out there. Retired blogger John Left here, emerging from contented seclusion for ONE TIME and one time ONLY to bring you a Very Important message.

To make it easy for ya, Brother John is going to break the message down into two easy-to-swallow parts:

1.) Election Day is next Tuesday. Don’t even think about not voting. You have to. And I’m not just saying that it’s crucial that you cast your ballot---it is, more than ever before. I’m also ORDERING you to do so. Yes, just like your dad. I’m using the Jedi mind-melding trick. I have been since you started reading this. You will vote next Tuesday. You will. You have no choice. Vote. Vote. Vote! And haul at least two friends to the polls, too. Obi-John commands you!

2.) Friends, these are dire times we’re living in. Back in the day, I used to say that human life is not a partisan issue. It’s still true---truer now, in fact, than ever before, which is why you simply must vote Tuesday. ‘member on Sesame Street when they used to play that game, “One of These Things is Not Like the Other”? Where they’d put two very similar objects side-by-side and you’d have to tell how one differed from the other? Wellp, evidently some of us still find that task to be a challenge, so I’m going to make it easy for you. When you go to mark your ballot next Tuesday (And you will. You will!), just vote for:

Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama
Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama
Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama
Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama
Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama
Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama
Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama
Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama
Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama
Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama
Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama
Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama
Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama
Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama Obama


This way, we’ll have a supergroovycool America and a niftyneatoswell Earth to live in/on, at least for another four years. Got it?

Good. So vote for Obama already! Peace, out.